Reflections on our Summer

I was beat down before the summer even started. We had plans. This was going to be the best Boston summer yet! – join a new gym, go hiking, camping, exploring, and work to make sure the camper was complete by our 8/31 deadline. But, just as the days were getting longer and the trees were budding, I turned my ankle into a messed up situation that changed the course of our summer.

I couldn’t leave the apartment for a straight two weeks after surgery (though I spent the majority of two months holed up there). And we had just sold all of our furniture and most of our belongings, in the expectation we’d be moving into our 152 square foot tiny home. When that didn’t happen, we had to use the foam cushions from the camper bed as our bed on the floor in our summer sublet.

So, sleeping on cushions, living out of boxes, and learning how to use crutches, I forged ahead. This turned into Justin having to do most of the housework. He cooked, did laundry, took care of the cat, grocery shopped, and cleaned. I can’t imagine how stressful this was for him, but he never once complained or took stress out on me. I married a good man. (And let’s not forget him carrying me naked to the bathroom the night after my surgery, in order to elevate my ankle while I peed because anything else was excruciating.)

So, those months were trying on both of us, but during those weeks and weeks of sitting in bed, I was able to turn inward, actually creating a very positive experience. I meditated every morning, read books, started a photography class online (how many photos of an empty living room and a cat can you take?), and focused on my aspirations for the next few years. (Not to mention lots of Netflix.)

And once I was able to leave the apartment on crutches, we began camping nearly every weekend in our truck turned camper. Justin would back the truck into a campsite and I would stretch out in our little truck bed oasis; we really made the most of it.

 

A photo posted by Wild We Wander (@wildwewander) on Jun 12, 2016 at 2:20pm PDT

But, I feel like it all derailed–my mental / spiritual progress–on the morning of June 26. My brother had passed away. My big brother, who I’d looked up to my whole life; who had a four-year old son, a wife, so much family and friends who loved him, a future… I think this has consumed me for nearly three months.

I recently texted with Ruth, one of Josh’s other sisters, and she summed up well what every day feels like: “life is in that weird limbo of good and bad.” One minute I would be smiling and fine and the next, triggered to tears by a photo, song, thought, or kind word. I know Josh has only moved on to another realm, but he left a lot of people who miss his presence everyday.

So, now, whenever I’m faced with an annoying or overwhelming situation, it’s easier to put it into perspective in relation to this summer and to life. Our 8/31 camper deadline waved as it passed right on by, so we adjusted (as one has to do) and moved to the beach into a 200 square foot house.

 

A photo posted by Wild We Wander (@wildwewander) on Aug 31, 2016 at 11:06am PDT

Why not? Justin and I both needed a slower pace in a simpler place after this summer. Beach walks and sunrises may be my renewal back to that place of inner peace. 

Our lives will seemingly go by in the blink of an eye, so I want to fill every one of my minutes with joy, love, and adventure.

For Josh.